Books You Won’t Find at Borders

So I was bored. I came up with some "interesting" sounding titles for stories I could write. Then I made up taglines and quotes and whatnots. Then I made up "funny" genres for them. Anyway, here they are for your reading enjoyment. Did I mention I was bored when I came up with these? See if you can identify the books/pop culture I am citing/mocking.

 

Title: Corn on the Bob

Back cover: Crispy and delicious! Just wait until you sink your teeth into these succulent favorites. Whether you're having Brad for Breakfast, Larry for Lunch, or Dan for Dinner you're sure to love fresh Butterfingers and Toes, Soylent Violet, and Shin Shish KaBob or Mark or whomever!

Genre: Cannibal Cookbook

 

Title: Waste of Tim

Opening line: He was the best of Tims. He was the worst if Tims.

Genre: Classical non-literature

 

Title: Firestarter Local 501

Quote from book: "Gentlemen, we got a fire to get started. Get it, everything is backwards here! Is your mind blown yet?"

Genre: Mad, Mad, World Literature

 

Title: Where the Wild Thing's Ain't

Synopsis: Here they is! Oh, wait never mind. . .

Genre: Children's illiterature

 

Title: Weekend Getaway You Creeper!

Tagline: It started out as such a nice "retreat."

Genre: Horror-ible Vacation Guidebooks

 

Title: Life, the Universe, and How to Go About Ruining It for Just about Everyone

Chapter One: Don't Drink the Water.

Genre: Self Hinder Books

 

Title: For Us, the Dying

Last line: "If they don't get us, the tedium will."

Genre: Love Advice and Pickup Lines for Zombie Survivors

 

Title: Them! And It! And Us?

Surprise twist ending: We are the villains in this nerve shattering nightmare!

Genre: Clichés from the 50s