I Really Texted That In

You know the saying, he phoned it in, meaning he didn't put any effort in to it. I assume that this comes from some older person describing someone lazy who uses one of those telephony devices instead of getting on his horse and riding "it" into wherever he is lazily calling.

I think it is kind of funny how the older generation of any time period always thinks the new technology is just a way for slackers to slack off slackerly. Like when they invented the wheel some old man said, "in my day we carried things on our backs. Lazy young Methuselah."

They say "the old ways are the best ways." Um if that were true then the old ways would still be the ways. I may or may not have ranted about something similar to this. If I don't remember then I am sure you don't so I'll continue.

I bet sure as goose feathers fall faster than bullets that when the telephone came out, old people were calling these things useless dumdum doohickeys. Telephones are the wave of the future! techno gurus promised.

Then came long distance, person to person, car phones (haha cars made out of phones: what were they thinking?), wireless phones that allowed you to listen in on your neighbors discussing their snoopy neighbors, then the original 12 lb cellular telephone (only 1.99 per minute!). These are all waves of the past. Now cells are thimble sized computers. Texting is the wave of the present, gramps.

Texting allows you to communicate with multiple people while working, skiing, sleep driving, piloting a hovercraft through uncharted desert in search of dinosaur gold, murdering a family in their sleep, or you know whatever.

Anyway, calling is a nice quaint feature of a cell. It can calculate tips too. But really phones are for texting. And the inter-nets. And music or directions to the mall or digital photography or blogging or whatever you "need" right then that second.

I suspect one day I'll be complaining to my grandkids in the old folks home how life was better when we had to use our fingers to text. "Telekinesis is a waste of time," I'll say. Then some punk little kid will say, "you mean you have to use your hands? It's like a baby's toy."

I'll string that little gibberer's scrawny neck. But it will be OK because senile people are expected to attack smart mouthed children. Of course I won't live past 50 but this exact situation will occur at least 100 times a day somewhere.

That's all I have to say. This blog post is kind of dull. I guess I really texted it in.