Guest Blogger

Well, since I wrote a story for Josh and Rachel, I guess it's time to write one for Jonathan. Told you I was in high demand. And in case you don't read Rachel and Josh's blogs and have no idea who this crazy person talking is, it's Jonathan's sister-in-law Kristina. So here goes nothing. And by nothing I actually mean a story.

Ronathel

By Kristina Bohman

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful girl named Rapunzel. She had long gorgeous hair, got locked up in a tower, and then let her handsome prince climb up and save her using her hair as a rope. Yeah yeah yeah. That's my sister. I'm Ronathel, Rapunzel's younger sister by one year. Sometimes it can be kind of annoying, always being overshadowed like that. But I'm not bitter about it. I mean, she really is very beautiful. But kinda dumb. I mean, really, just because some old witch stuck her in a tower, she thinks she has to stay there forever, pining away for her Prince Charming or whatever. But don't let her hear me call him that. She insists I call him Prince Edmund, even though we all know Edmund is just a middle name, and Charming is his first name. Rapunzel says it's feeding a bad stereotype, though. As if she isn't, by being the poor defenseless damsel in distress waiting for some guy to come along and save her? Don't get me wrong, I love chivalry and guys standing up for girls, but come on girls! You can do some stuff for yourself once in a while! Of course, I'm rather biased, because of my own experience with girl power or whatever it is you want to call it. You see, I didn't grow up in a tower, so I actually got out and had some adventures...

The whole time I was growing up, it was an accepted fact that my sister was stuck in some tower. In fact, I thought that was where all big sisters went. It made me wonder, though, why she never even seemed to try and get out. We visited her every third Tuesday of the month, under the witch's supervision of course, and Rapunzel always seemed perfectly content to stay where she was. Sitting there and knitting isn't exactly what I'd be doing, but she seemed happy enough, so why bother her about it? It'd just make her mad at me. But I guess it wasn't all knitting or crocheting or whatever. She also took a couple hours every day washing, drying, and doing her hair. Even stuck in a tower, she can be so vain sometimes! She also painted, when she could get the supplies for it. But did I mention she's vain? Yeah, almost everything she painted was a portrait of herself.

So I had a picture of her when I went to go work at the palace. After all, my parents wasted all their time trying to bargain with the witch to give Rapunzel back, so it was up to me to earn money for the family. And hey, what girl wouldn't mind going to a castle and maybe meeting the prince? I got a job in the kitchen and soon they all realized what a great cook I was.

Then came that fateful day. Prince Char-uh, I mean, Prince *Edmund* came into the kitchens to get a snack or something, and ran into me! He asked if I was the one who had made his delicious breakfast that morning, and I told him indeed I was. He didn't seem very interested, though, as he kept looking around. That's when he noticed my painting of Rapunzel. He was smitten as soon as he saw it. What does that say about me? He actually meets me in real life, and could care less, then sees a badly painted picture of Rapunzel and falls in love? Am I really that hideous? I'm not. Rapunzel just has that effect on people.

Anyways, he immediately wrote a letter to her. Of course I didn't read it, but you could tell by the way he blushed when he gave it to me to deliver that it was pretty mushy. Delivering it was no small matter, though. That crazy witch guards her tower really well. I had to sneak over in the middle of the night (and that witch is a master sneak, so she's really suspicious about other sneaks, so I had to swim up to the tower through the swamp next to it), climb up the tower (with her whining the whole time about how much it hurt her poor head), deliver the message, then sneak back out. And the next night I had to do the same thing to go get her message for him!

Anyways, one day I brought the prince there. He's the worst sneak that ever snuck! First of all, he whined about going in the swamp in his nice clothes. I warned him beforehand that he'd be getting dirty! Then he stumbled over one of the sleeping guard dogs! It was a huge vicious rottweiler, and I was certain I'd die, but that's where we jumped back into the swamp. No living creature in its right mind would go in that thing, so we were safe. But obviously not in our right minds. Anyways, he finally got to meet Rapunzel in person. She hardly complained at all when HE climbed up using her hair, even though I'm sure he weighs at least 50 pounds more than me. Not that he's fat or anything. Just really, really tall.

So that's the real story of how Rapunzel ended up with her love. I introduced them, scoped out ways for that bumbling prince to get to her, and practically had to hold his hand the whole way there. It may not be much of an adventure, but it would take too long to write down the time of when I defeated the dragon, so this is what you get instead. So next time you hear about Rapunzel, just remember that none of it would have been possible without me, Ronathel.