This is a true story. Real names have been changed to protect the innocent. Just kidding, we're all guilty here (except Don Cheadle).
OK so at work I sometimes attend review sessions via telephony (as opposed to telereally). In times past I would occasionally borrow Don Cheadle's headset (not the real Don Cheadle of course because as you recall, names have been changed to protect the innocent). Anyway a certain somebody (let's call her Margarine) was under the impression that the department had a couple headsets under its dominion for community use.
So Don Cheadle left us for pastures of relatively similar hue. Anyway Donny took the headset. No big deal. But now we have none or they are just unaccounted for. They're AWOL! So then even though I don't need one in the immediate future, I felt for some reason still unbeknownst to even me, that I should have access to one, you know in case of dire imminent need (the same reasoning used by crazy Steward Denethol in Lord of the Rings to bring the One Ring to Gondor).
So I encouraged the Steward of Headsets (Margarine) to inquire deeply into the matter. She emailed Don about it asking ever so politely and coyly if Mr. Cheadle knew what had happened to the One Headset of Power. The idea was for him to realize he had accidently taken it and bring it home.
The idea was to be super sneaky about demanding its return. The Don [sic] said that he actually still had it and IT had signed it out to him and he wondered why Mr. Smith didn't do the same (was IT out of headsets?). I am Mr. Smith btw (my name was dropped so hard in that email convo that I think it has internal hemorrhaging).
Basically we got schooled.
And I can't ask IT for one because my need isn't dire enough and also I was just there an hour ago to get a new number 1 for my laptop. I have to wait six more months before I can return for further IT support (my own rule that everyone should conform to).
That Margarine girl sounds weird. I bet she has come complex about headsets and needs a bit of therapy.
ReplyDeleteThis Mr. Smith guy needs to ask Don himself so the names don't get dropped and are instead slammed into the person. That's my next plan. Or we can make a suggestion box for each person and place it in their cube.
Ouch. Good thing your name isn't Mr. Smith. Sounds like his name had a bit of a rough time.
ReplyDeleteFavorite part: "...was for him to be realize...". Why are you Mr. Smith? Did you ever go to Washington to secure conservative values in Congress?
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