OK so I am a failure at life, life giving that is. I have tried and failed in times past to donate blood to those in need. Unfortunately my blood was too slow. So they threw it away. Apparently if it is not a full bag, then it can't save nobody. And that sucked because it was really hard for them to get any outta me.
Not only is my red sauce super slow, it is impossible to find, like the Holy Grail of hemoglobin (or the hobgoblin of hemoglobin). It always takes the arm stabbers several tries to get that precious human juice. And once they're inside, they just keep poking away in there till something spews out (my veins should be called Old Unfaithful). This morning I was supposed to get tested for this "awesome" study Rachie and I are participating in. Anyway, three stabs and three droplets later, and no crimson gush.
So I am gonna drink a lake full of water and try again Monday morning. Now I look like a freaking junky with these needle wounds. I am a blood flunky who looks like a junkie.
I need another hit man! One last dance with the dragon to kill the pain.
I look crunk and this blog is a flunk.
Yeah, Jonathan. Lay off the drugs until after work. That is the best way to start Conference weekend. :)
ReplyDeleteYeah but what a way to end it, right.
ReplyDeleteNot that I'm laughing at your pain, but this is hilarious (again, not your pain, but the blog). I like how she just put a big old wad of gauze and taped it to your arm. It goes nicely with the junkie theme.
ReplyDeletehahaha, this post is hilarious
ReplyDeleteI like the blog title. This one was really funny.
ReplyDelete