Spiteful in Spite of It All or Beep Those Beeping Beepers that Stole My Beeper

So I own a bicycle which is a pretty nifty little number considering its old age; it would be a senior citizen in doggy years. Anyway to top it off, it is adorned with a sweet horn, which goes beep, beep, beep. Now my apartment has three men who have girlfriends and one cranky pants who hates women. So since 75% of this apartment's denizens could potentially be kissing or handholding on the couch at any given moment, initially as a joke my roommate Fitzwilliam (Fitzy for short) beeped my horn outside our apartment, as a gentle warning. Haha. Very funny, Fitzy. Somehow it became a regular practice for a couple of us to beep it before entering.

All is well so far. But wait, then the round squishy black thing that you squeeze to make the noise (my roommate seems to think of it as some sort of mini plunger) was gone! Someone has taken it. Some beeper has stolen my beeper! So as forgiving as I usually am, I am choosing to punish the bicycle horn thief by blowing into the horn with my mouth when I come home, which by the way is way louder. Yeah now that is some real old fashioned good American spite. I am hoping he will unscrew the rest of the horn because I am all ready for plan C: buying a whole new horn and carrying it in my pocket so I can blow that sucker every time I come and go. Good thing I come and go a lot. I know I should be more considerate or forgiving but in spite of it all I remain spiteful. At least until I get bored. Or I hear a lesson about it in Sunday school and get called to repentance.