So I was just reading an article about how Lucas and Spielbergo are working on the next Indiana Jonsey flick and how disappointing the latest one was (Indian Jones and the Aliens that Taught People to Farm Well but then Decided to Leave Except they Couldn't Because they Were Made of Crystal and they Lost One of their Glass Noggins). They should have just called it Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Clichés from George Lucas' Childhood. So I was thinking that I had kept my hopes low even though the trailer for Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Blah Blah
Blah was really awesome.
I was also thinking how awesome a lot of trailers are from movies that end up being big let downs. Case in point X-men Origins: Wolverine. Despite the stupid title (what is wrong with just calling it Wolverine?) I thought it was gonna be awesome. It was so-so. It had some good gut gutting and Gambit but for the most part disappointing. Now that I am writing this, I kind of want to watch the Wolverine trailer again. It's pretty bad-bottomed when he jumps out of his electric bathtub and gets all angry and clawish and slashy. Then he leaps all slow-mo onto a helicopter from an exploding Hummer. Why did I need to see the movie? The trailer had everything I wanted.
So here is why trailers are infinitely better than any actual movie could be.
1) They take the best parts of the movie and send them at us all lickety-split. So we are thinking whoa this movie is exciting (as if we were Keanu Reeves in a Shakespeare film).
2) There are no boring parts. AKA opening title credits. Only the pure actiony awesomeness.
3) They have no wasted dialogue. They tell only the funny jokes and coolest lines.
4) They are short! Yes in today's modern quick-quick-quick workaday whirlwind world we live in, who has more than 3 minutes to watch a movie that is probably not gonna live up to the hype anyways.
5) Trailers improve on the story. How many times has a carefully edited trailer tricked you into thinking it was about monsters when the movie didn't have nay a monster at all? A little misleading sure, but you can't be disappointed with the film unless the trailer rewrite was in fact better than the "real" movie.
6) Different versions = variety. Because different trailers have different parts they are like watching different movies. Awesome. If variety is the spice of life then the pre-movie previews are like gumbo. Yumbo.
My theory is this. It's all about the motivation. Directors are thinking either about their own artistic aspirations (stupid childhoods from the 50s) or how they can get their paws on the Oscar. Trailer makers are all about pleasing us. They want to get us to absolutely love the trailer so we will see the movie no matter how awful the full length reel is (reel poopy). So they have to make a good product; they just have to. Trailers make me happier than any full length movie could. If only we could convince the trailer makers to make movies we would have some real art.
Coming soon to a theater near you! You can see again all of these fun clips and one-liners, interspersed with boring dialogue, less plot than the trailer had, and nonsensical directing. Oh, and some of your favorite parts won't even make it into the movie.
ReplyDeleteI started reading your blog but it was soooooo long, and I live in a world of quick quick quickness, so I quit reading. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteCamilla, is this short enough for you to read: go to
ReplyDeleteNice. :)
ReplyDeleteBut what about really cool movies, Like the Princess Bride? Are you saying that you'd cut out the absolutely amazing duel scene, and so much more? Some movies are worse then their trailers, but some aren't.
ReplyDeleteOld movies don't count because old trailers are no good, but yes if they made a new version of the movie and a new trailer then it would be concentrated goodness.
ReplyDeleteThe reason trailers are so good is for two reasons; one they are art by themselves, and two because they're designed as the best marketing tool imaginable. Trailers aren't like other advertising, usually you're seeing them on the big screen, where you watch big movies. They were invented before television and internet, and with the big medium they were presented on they needed to be just as big.
ReplyDeleteAs well, the film industry and been at the forefront of marketing since it's inception. Marketing budgets get bigger and bigger every year and a good chunk of change goes to the production companies that's sole purpose is to make a trailer.
One more point, trailers are like poems, they get right to the point and give you the essence of the film. Which is why I almost cried during the trailer of Precious, but then didn't get close at all to crying during the movie.
ReplyDelete