So I was starving Sunday night at midnight and couldn't sleep, so I went to Betos or Rancheritos, or whatever they are legally obligated to call themselves now. Anyway so I pull up to the drive-thru and. . .
Speaker: Pkkkerk. How can I help you?
Me: Yeah, can I get carne asada fries, with no guacamole and extra sour cream.
Speaker: Fries don’t come with guacamole, only salt.
Me: No I want carne asada fries.
Speaker: Carne asada torta? Anything else.
Me: No carne asada fries with no guacamole and extra sour cream.
Speaker: Carne asada fries with extra guacamole and no sour cream. Anything else?
Me: No, you have it backwards. No guacamole and extra sour cream. And a large horchata.
Speaker: Carna asada fries with no guac and extra sour cream and a small horchata. Anything else?
Me: No, a large horchata.
Speaker: Small?
Me: Large!
Speaker: Small?
Me: Large horchata!
Speaker: Small.
Me: Large!
Then when I get to the window the Mexie youth in the window hands me a small horchata. A small-freaking-horchata! I can't drink a tiny horchata: it's half ice for one thing, and I don't drink small-sized anything.
I calmly say I wanted a large, then he laughs at me and pulls out a large horchata. Then he lets me have both for being “a good sport.” I laughed so I wouldn't seem like a cranky old man, even though a second horchata didn't make up for his wreckless shenanigans.
You know you’re getting old when you are on this side of the drive-thru pranking. Also I woke up with a tummy ache. Still worth it.
Carne asada fries are always worth it.
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